Tuesday, April 29, 2008
One Step Closer!
Today we had yet another court appearance on my Mom's estate and it appears that it may actually be drawing to a close finally. I am starting to realize even more powerfully how very much negative energy this thing has injected into our lives for the past two years. As it seemingly draws to conclusion, I am starting to feel the pressure lift and am giving praise to God for that! I am eager to just have it over and to be able to focus on other far more important things in our lives (like our kids and our home and our church). Another court date on June 2nd should get it all wrapped up and closed and then we can put it in the past. Praise the Lord for that and I do ask that my friends be praying for us as we close this chapter in our lives and move on to a brighter future putting the negativity of this messy thing as far behind us as possible!
Tuesday, April 22, 2008
2 years and counting...
As of yesterday, my Mom has been gone now for two years and we still have not seen closure on many fronts. I cannot believe that things have drug on for so long with so many bumps in the road. I keep hoping and praying that the estate will be settled soon and every time I think it is going to happen, there is another issue that arises to keep things dragging on longer. It seems that many people in our world are more content with uncertainty and chaos than they are with moving on with life. I have never been that way, so it eludes my understanding to think that there are those who would rather fight over petty things than to simply move on. The painful part for me (which I believe is why some are being so aggressive) is that Mom's life has been reduced by some in the family to what they can "get". Mom was so much more than things and sadly few people seem to recognize that truth. I hope and pray it is all settled soon and ALL of us can focus ourselves on what really matters eternally and learn what lessons we need to learn to move on with our lives.
But, through it all... more than anything... more than the pain I feel from the division of the family... more than all of the legal wrangling... I just miss my Mom!
But, through it all... more than anything... more than the pain I feel from the division of the family... more than all of the legal wrangling... I just miss my Mom!
Saturday, April 12, 2008
a full year
If Ian was a puppy, we would be able to switch him to regular dog food tomorrow! Actually, it is hard to believe that he will be a year old. Even harder to believe is that Joey is just a couple of weeks away from 3 years old! But, then again, at some levels it seems like we have always had them with us. But, my what a year it has been. I am amazed by the growth that we have seen in both of them. Ian is super close to taking off walking... I am guessing that is the next milestone for him. But, then again, is some ways ther eis a new milestone every single day. We are truly blessed by both of our children. I realize more each day how truly blessed we are.
Life has had more than its share of bumps in the road for me personally in the past couple of years... But the road will smooth out soon and I only pray that Jenny and the kids have not been too terribly hurt by the other issues that have eaten up my time and energy for far too long with regard to my family of origin. Soon, I pray, those issues will be resolved and behind us all forever... and we can get on with the life God has before us!
Life has had more than its share of bumps in the road for me personally in the past couple of years... But the road will smooth out soon and I only pray that Jenny and the kids have not been too terribly hurt by the other issues that have eaten up my time and energy for far too long with regard to my family of origin. Soon, I pray, those issues will be resolved and behind us all forever... and we can get on with the life God has before us!
Friday, March 28, 2008
my buddy
Hero April 15, 2000 - March 28, 2008
After almost 8 years, my buddy Hero passed away. I went down to the basement as I do every day to take him outside for the day to find him barely hanging on after having been suffering for obviously several hours. I found a wonderful animal hospital in Alton (Pope Animal Hospital) who could see him right away and sadly, the only option we were left with was euthanasia. Sometime during the night, he had suffered a major neurological event and was suffering a great deal. I stayed with him until the very end. Hero was a great friend to me when I was a single guy and adapted well to the addition of a wife and later two children. He was always "up" (sometimes too much;-). But, he enjoyed every day of his life. Just yesterday, he was running and jumping around and barking... Oh, how we will miss that bark.
He was a great dog and we will miss him very much! Joey has already said several times that she loved Hero and misses him... Every night, as I put Joey to bed, she wants me to tell her a "Hero Story" These are stories that I make up as I tell them about a little girl named Joey and her best friend named Hero who go on adventures around the neighborhood rescuing other animals and children in trouble. Tonight, just like all other nights, Joey asked me for a Hero story. So, with tears in my eyes I told her a story about Joey and Hero going on an adventure to save someone's day (a little lost bunny rabbit this time)... She drifted off to sleep with Hero on her mind and in her heart, a place where Hero will remain for all of us as time goes by. Rest in peace my friend!
After almost 8 years, my buddy Hero passed away. I went down to the basement as I do every day to take him outside for the day to find him barely hanging on after having been suffering for obviously several hours. I found a wonderful animal hospital in Alton (Pope Animal Hospital) who could see him right away and sadly, the only option we were left with was euthanasia. Sometime during the night, he had suffered a major neurological event and was suffering a great deal. I stayed with him until the very end. Hero was a great friend to me when I was a single guy and adapted well to the addition of a wife and later two children. He was always "up" (sometimes too much;-). But, he enjoyed every day of his life. Just yesterday, he was running and jumping around and barking... Oh, how we will miss that bark.
He was a great dog and we will miss him very much! Joey has already said several times that she loved Hero and misses him... Every night, as I put Joey to bed, she wants me to tell her a "Hero Story" These are stories that I make up as I tell them about a little girl named Joey and her best friend named Hero who go on adventures around the neighborhood rescuing other animals and children in trouble. Tonight, just like all other nights, Joey asked me for a Hero story. So, with tears in my eyes I told her a story about Joey and Hero going on an adventure to save someone's day (a little lost bunny rabbit this time)... She drifted off to sleep with Hero on her mind and in her heart, a place where Hero will remain for all of us as time goes by. Rest in peace my friend!
Thursday, March 27, 2008
Justice?
Time for another update on the fiasco with my family of origin and the settling (or not) of my mother's estate. My mom has been gone for nearly two years and only now are we beginning to see some movement on the settling of her estate. Greed has run rampant in my family of origin and the fractures are clear and evident and will most assuredly be permanent. That is the most painful part of this whole ordeal, as I have stated on more than one ocassion. I have had my character assaulted, my childhood possessions held hostage, and have been prohibited from being involved in the cathartic process of even looking at anything that belonged to my mom. There are those who are trying to play nice to my face, but then run to others and join them in their character attacks on me. As a result, I am having a hard time trusting anyone. The very people who should have been expected to pull together to support one another have let their desires for control and "ownership" of things get in the way of what a family should do by definition.
The court today made some nominal progress towards getting things moving again, but I am not terribly optimistic that much will be accomplished. There are some deadlines in place on all of us, but I am not terribly hopeful that they will be honored by all concerned. Up until these past two years, I had believed in the judicial system. At this point, my faith in that system has crumbled. If a person is willing to attack others vigorously enough and has no internal barometer of that which is truly right and wrong, then those are the ones who will "win"... at least in the present. (My personal feeling is that given the current situation and the "best case" outcome is that everyone involved in this one will lose.)
The one thing I do still believe in is a God who is loving and ever faithful towards those who serve him and are intent on a faithful interpretation of his word and his call to us. I also believe that God is the only true source of comfort. People change in response to their own desires. God alone remains constant in his unchanging love for his children. How blessed I am to have a heavenly father who will remain faithful and true. I wish that relity for everyone and perhaps someday it will come to pass. Is justice at the hands of a court system run by and participated in by human beings even capable of understanding true justice? Much less administrating it? I am having my doubts. Is God alone always just in his treatment of people? Of that I have no doubt and in that truth I rest my destiny.
The court today made some nominal progress towards getting things moving again, but I am not terribly optimistic that much will be accomplished. There are some deadlines in place on all of us, but I am not terribly hopeful that they will be honored by all concerned. Up until these past two years, I had believed in the judicial system. At this point, my faith in that system has crumbled. If a person is willing to attack others vigorously enough and has no internal barometer of that which is truly right and wrong, then those are the ones who will "win"... at least in the present. (My personal feeling is that given the current situation and the "best case" outcome is that everyone involved in this one will lose.)
The one thing I do still believe in is a God who is loving and ever faithful towards those who serve him and are intent on a faithful interpretation of his word and his call to us. I also believe that God is the only true source of comfort. People change in response to their own desires. God alone remains constant in his unchanging love for his children. How blessed I am to have a heavenly father who will remain faithful and true. I wish that relity for everyone and perhaps someday it will come to pass. Is justice at the hands of a court system run by and participated in by human beings even capable of understanding true justice? Much less administrating it? I am having my doubts. Is God alone always just in his treatment of people? Of that I have no doubt and in that truth I rest my destiny.
Thursday, February 21, 2008
Why?
"Why?" That was the title I gave to the funeral sermon that I delivered yesterday. I can't say as I really answered the question, though. The more I am in ministry, the less I understand about so many things in this world. Why indeed!
I travelled back to Taylorville to do a funeral for the 19 year old daughter of some very dear friends of mine. Katie was killed in a tragic car accident with three other teenagers on Friday of last week. They were good solid decent kids. No drugs, no drinking, solid morals and people of faith... and yet, four young lives were lost without warning. The thing is that with their passing the world lost all of the potential for greatness that existed in them as well.
This accident reminds me (and others I hope) of the broken-ness of the world. Satan really does rule this world whether we believe it or not. As we are 2 weeks into the Lenten season, I am reminded of the temptation of Christ and the fact that even our Lord wasn't immune to the temptations and attacks of Satan. So, why then, should I be surprised that Satan would attack others if he would be so brazen as to attack the creator himself?
As I grieve along with others on the loss of potential and the loss of beauty in this accident, I am reminded of just how very much I yearn for the day when Christ returns to set things right. What an amazing thing to anticipate that day when we live daily in the presence of God in a kingdom where sickness and death and broken-ness are a thing of the past... FOR ETERNITY.
Why? I can't answer that... Who? I've got that figured out! But, then, why are there still people in this world who reject or ignore that hope? Seems that my reflections on the things of the faith generate more questions than answers. Furthermore, why is it after years of study, seminary education, and 15 years of pastoral ministry... I'm back to asking one word questions and still don't have an answer? Aw shucks... Why Not?
I travelled back to Taylorville to do a funeral for the 19 year old daughter of some very dear friends of mine. Katie was killed in a tragic car accident with three other teenagers on Friday of last week. They were good solid decent kids. No drugs, no drinking, solid morals and people of faith... and yet, four young lives were lost without warning. The thing is that with their passing the world lost all of the potential for greatness that existed in them as well.
This accident reminds me (and others I hope) of the broken-ness of the world. Satan really does rule this world whether we believe it or not. As we are 2 weeks into the Lenten season, I am reminded of the temptation of Christ and the fact that even our Lord wasn't immune to the temptations and attacks of Satan. So, why then, should I be surprised that Satan would attack others if he would be so brazen as to attack the creator himself?
As I grieve along with others on the loss of potential and the loss of beauty in this accident, I am reminded of just how very much I yearn for the day when Christ returns to set things right. What an amazing thing to anticipate that day when we live daily in the presence of God in a kingdom where sickness and death and broken-ness are a thing of the past... FOR ETERNITY.
Why? I can't answer that... Who? I've got that figured out! But, then, why are there still people in this world who reject or ignore that hope? Seems that my reflections on the things of the faith generate more questions than answers. Furthermore, why is it after years of study, seminary education, and 15 years of pastoral ministry... I'm back to asking one word questions and still don't have an answer? Aw shucks... Why Not?
Somber Boy
I just loved Ian's expression in this picture. He laughs and smiles a whole lot more these days, but I still love that little serious face he makes too.
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